Apprehension of a kiss
by Julia Weasley
Summary: RHr fic! This was written for a challenge on www.checkmated.com An overly anxious Ron contemplates the nerve racking task of giving Hermione their first kiss on New Year's Eve.


Apprehension of a kiss  
  
By Julia Weasley  
  
Ron chewed on his thumb, unconsciously trying to relieve some of the stress he felt inside of his chest. He searched for the bravery deep down inside himself that he knew he must possess; otherwise, the Sorting Hat wouldn't have placed him in Gryffindor. Trying to find the strength to work up the courage of what he was trying to convince himself to do, he started pacing the length of his room.  
  
Tonight was perfect. It was now or never and he knew that if he let this ideal chance pass him by, a better opportunity would not come again for quite some time. Besides, he reasoned with himself, it's not like she wasn't expecting it. It was a tradition, so it's not like it was going to be a big surprise or anything. She was bound to know what was coming.  
  
Ron cringed at this thought. The problem with that was the fact of the incredible pressure that was on him. He knew what needed to be done, but that didn't make the upcoming task any easier. If anything, the knowledge of her expecting this made it that much harder on him.  
  
He sighed and fell with a thud on his bed. This was a nightmare. Ron placed an arm over his eyes, the coolness of it, relieving some of the growing tension behind them. Why did the guy always get stuck with all of the hard things? In the four months Ron and Hermione had officially been boyfriend and girlfriend, all either of them had managed to work up the courage for was a couple of hasty kisses on the cheek. There was of course, much blushing and stuttering involved every time it happened.  
  
Now the problem had grown with each passing month and it was driving him mad. Whenever Ron would talk to Harry about it, all the advice he could give Ron was to "just do it, whenever the urge took him". The unhelpful hints from Harry didn't help him in the least. Ron just reasoned with himself that Ginny had probably had to make the first move and that Harry was just not telling him the truth.  
  
Hermione wasn't any help herself.  
  
It wasn't like they didn't talk about this particularly tricky problem, because they did.quite often much to his dismay. Ron growled in frustration. It happened to be one of Hermione's favorite subjects. However, the way he saw it, was that it was all very well and good for Hermione to keep bringing it up, but she never had any solutions to their "problem". Whenever he asked her to just kiss him whenever she felt like it, she would protest with "I'm just as nervous as you are." or something equally brilliant like "The girl shouldn't have to make the first move."  
  
Make the first move his arse. If he had never told Hermione one night in a fit of temper that he completely and totally adored and loved her, then where would they be? Ron snorted. Nowhere that's for sure, because he knew she would've never had to courage to admit to her own feelings. Still.How did she think he felt about it? It wasn't like he did this sort of thing everyday either. He'd never kissed anyone just like she hadn't. His stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch.  
  
He was feeling nauseous again as he had at breakfast. His mother had sincerely looked worried about him when he couldn't even manage one plate of food that morning. Harry and Ginny hadn't made breakfast any easier on him. They both kept shooting knowing looks at him and then grinning at each other, making Ron wish he hadn't confided in Harry that he was finally going to kiss Hermione tonight. Obviously, Harry could no longer keep anything to himself. It had taken everything in him to stop himself from giving both of them swift kicks under the table. To make matters worse, Hermione seemed oblivious to everything around her at the table. The least she could've done was notice how distressed he was about everything or at the very least, share in some of his agony.  
  
Now, he was lying across his bed trying to settle his stomach and his mind for what was to come later that night. He looked around at the alarm on his stand and saw to his dismay that it was already 9:15 p.m. In less than one hour's time, he would be expected downstairs to greet the people his parents had invited over for New Year's.  
  
Drawing a deep breath, he determinedly got up from his bed and began preparing himself for the inevitable.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________ ________________________  
  
Forty-five minutes later, Ron bounded down the stairs with Harry at his side. They were supposed to have been downstairs five minutes ago, but Mrs. Weasley's voice hadn't been heard shouting up at them to hurry it up, so both boys felt at ease.  
  
When they were almost to the bottom of the stairs, Ron noticed Hermione standing near the front door with Ginny. His heart gave a little jerk. She looked so beautiful, with her hair falling around her shoulders; he almost fell off the last step. He heard Harry quietly laugh at him, and mentally reminded himself to give Harry a good kick in the arse as soon as tonight was over.  
  
He watched Hermione turn her head and notice him. A smile broke out on her face and he felt a delightful little squirm in the pit of his stomach.  
  
"Hey," he heard himself saying in a higher voice than he intended as he walked up to her. He wasn't surprised by how nervous he was feeling. This was Hermione, he kept trying to remind himself.  
  
She smiled and tucked her hand in his. "Hey back," she said.  
  
He was so concentrated on Hermione, that he was startled when someone grabbed his arm.  
  
"I've been asking you," said Ginny with barely hidden amusement, "if you and Hermione wanted to get something to eat with us. Hermione already said yes."  
  
Ron blinked. He noticed Hermione smiling at him again. "Sure," he heard himself say.  
  
"Mum already has everything set up in the kitchen and all of the other guests are already here," Ginny said leading the way to the kitchen. Ron followed her and Harry, with Hermione by his side.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________ ________________________  
  
The night was going by so fast for Ron and as the time approached midnight, he could feel himself getting more and more anxious. It didn't matter how panicky he was getting, he was determined to kiss her or die trying.  
  
As he chatted with Fred and George, he kept stealing glances at his girlfriend who was directly across the room from him talking animatedly to Tonks, Ginny and Harry. They were standing near Professor Lupin and Mad- Eye. As he watched her, he couldn't help but feel proud of her. He still didn't see how she was in love with him as much as he loved her, and yet, he knew it was true. He could tell just from the way she would hug him, or the way her voice would get soft and gentle whenever she and he were alone together. She was completely different when they were together by themselves.  
  
"It's five minutes 'til midnight!" came Mrs. Weasley's sing-song voice over the thick chatter in the house. Ron felt his heart starting to work double- time and his palms were suddenly sweaty. He nearly lost his grip on his cup of punch.  
  
He watched his mom start handing out pots to people, a tradition that she said her mother and grandmother always shared with her. He was amused by the silly superstition. At midnight, you would bang pots together and start the New Year by scaring bad demons and misfortune away from yourself for another year. He'd always been embarrassed by the tradition, because he couldn't help but think how dumb everyone looked banging away on their pots. He grinned. It was still fun.  
  
"Here you are dears," said Mrs. Weasley, thrusting a pot apiece to Fred, George and Ron. "Hurry up outside while I give out the rest of these." Ron noticed she looked thoroughly excited.  
  
As he set his cup on a nearby table, he caught Fred's eye and rolled his own, but Fred just grinned. The twins loved this part of the night. It seemed any reason to make a lot of noise was more than welcome to them.  
  
He searched for Hermione and saw her still standing with Tonks. He smiled at her as he caught her eye and she smiled back, waving him over to her. Finally reaching her, he held out his hand to her. When she grabbed it, he wove their fingers together. His breath caught a little at how well they fit together.  
  
They didn't speak even when they made their way out the door along with the others. He wondered if she was half as nervous as he was right now. He'd thought that she would be expecting to be kissed at midnight, but the very unwelcome thought of maybe she didn't suddenly entered his mind. Ok, now he was just in a state of fear. So many things could go wrong.  
  
"Thirty seconds!" called his father's excited voice.  
  
What if it turned out that he was a horrible kisser? That was a definite possibility. After all, he'd never kissed anyone before.  
  
"Twenty seconds!" Hermione's hand gave his a little squeeze.  
  
Now he knew, he definitely must be a bad kisser. Weren't you supposed to practice a little or something? Now he desperately wished he had tried to practice on his hand, instead of waving it away as a stupid idea.  
  
"Ten!"  
  
This was bad.  
  
"Nine!"  
  
He couldn't breathe.  
  
"Eight!"  
  
He was going to be sick.  
  
"Seven!"  
  
Why didn't he know how to apparate?  
  
"Six!"  
  
He must've been crazy thinking he could do this.  
  
"Five!"  
  
He wished they were back at ten.  
  
"Four!"  
  
How could he kiss her in front of everyone?  
  
"Three!"  
  
Oh..  
  
"Two!"  
  
My..  
  
"One!"  
  
God.  
  
"Happy New Year!"  
  
Everyone around him broke out into jubilant cheers and banging pots were heard clanging loudly throughout the yard. It was now or never.  
  
Just when Ron was resolved to kiss her, he was being grabbed by someone giving him an enormous hug and a kiss on the cheek shouting "Happy New Year!" to him. Through all the confusion, he lost grip of Hermione's hand. The disorder that followed jostled him away from her. After a minute or so he was nuts. Every time he tried to look around for her, he was pummeled by someone else wishing him a Happy New Year.  
  
Finally, over whoever was now hugging the life out of him, he caught a glimpse of her. She was being buffeted by an energetic Ginny. Both were smiling. He broke away from the person hugging him and tried to make his way over to her.  
  
Before he could reach her, Mrs. Weasley shouted for everyone to hear, "Well, Ron, go hug your girlfriend! It's tradition after all."  
  
He could feel his ears start to burn. Why did she have to say that? Didn't she realize he was trying desperately to make his way over to her unnoticed?  
  
He saw how embarrassed Hermione got when she heard what Mrs. Weasley said. Unexpectedly from somewhere inside himself, he said, "I'd like to do something else, but I'm not about to do it in front of everyone else!"  
  
The look on Mrs. Weasley's face would've made Ron laugh if he wasn't so intent on the task at hand.  
  
"Oh!" exclaimed Mrs. Weasley understanding dawning on her face, "Oh!" She started bustling everyone within a ten-foot range of her into the house. In her haste, she unknowingly broke up a heated kiss between Fred and Angelina. There was a huge commotion and then, nothing. The door closed behind Ginny and Harry in a resounding bang, but not before Harry gave Ron a wink.  
  
Then they were alone, standing in the front yard of the Burrow.  
  
"Well," Ron stammered, unsure of what to do.  
  
Before he could think of something else equally brilliant to say, he inched closer to her. He felt his throat become dry and he unconsciously licked his lips. He could tell how tense Hermione was, but he was determined to kiss her nevertheless. He could see little puffs of warm breath leaving Hermione's mouth. Her eyes were comically wide.  
  
Slowly, before he could lose his nerve, he moved his lips down to meet hers. He held his breath and then, their lips met. It felt like hundreds of chocolate frogs had sprung to life in the pit of his stomach. He couldn't believe how soft and warm her lips were. Only their hands touched one another.  
  
Why hadn't he done this before? As he was contemplating that very thought, he felt Hermione's lips moving away from his. He caught her lips again, this time in a slightly more passionate kiss, making Hermione's body tense for a moment before relaxing. He placed his arms around her waist bringing her flush against him so she couldn't escape. As he began worrying that he wasn't doing something right, he felt her arms encircle his neck. Hermione sighed into his mouth and kissed him with more feeling.  
  
When his breathing got a little heavier, he pulled back. He saw Hermione's eyes still closed. He couldn't help but feel stunned by what had just passed between them. When her eyes slowly fluttered open, his heart swelled with indescribable feeling. She was looking at him in a way he'd never seen. Her face broke into a grin.  
  
"We should've done that a long time ago," Hermione said in a breathy tone, obviously pleased by what had just happened.  
  
He laughed and kissed her again. He couldn't believe how easy it had been. After all of the worrying, they'd finally kissed and it had been wonderful.  
  
"Happy New Year, Hermione."  
  
A/N: Happy New Year to everyone at Checkmated!! 


End file.
